California Tech, v. 96:29, June 2, 1995

"To be great is to be misunderstood." The California TECH "Huh?" Volume XCVI, Number 29 Pasadena, California Biologist Ray Deshaies Named Searle Scholar from Caltech Public Relations cell cycle process. When Cdk has honors and distinction in bio-completed its task, it is deacti- chemistry, and earned his Ph.D., PASADENA - Assistant Pro- vated by the destruction of its fessor of Biology Ray Deshaies partner protein, cyclin. also in biochemistry, in 1988 at UC Berkeley. He held has been named a 1995 Searle Deshaies's lab hopes to exploit postdoctoral appointments at Scholar in recognition for his the genetic technologies avail- UC Berkeley and at UC San outstanding research in the field able for working with yeast to Francisco, and joined the of biochemistry and the genetics identify proteins that help con- Caltech faculty in January 1994. of cell division. He will use the trol Cdk activity. He and his col- In addition to being a Searle three-year, $180,000 grant to fur- leagues want to understand how Scholar, Deshaies is a Lucille P. ther his investigations into the cyclin, Cdk, and other proteins Markey Charitable Trust mechanisms of cell division in work in the cell cycle to ensure Scholar. the microorganism Saccharomyces that chromosomes are dupli- The Searle Scholars Pro- cerevisiae, otherwise known as cated and segregated accurately gram was established at the Chi- baker's yeast. during cell division. cago Community Trust in 1980, Work in many laboratories The activity of cyclin, Cdk, and is funded by the estates of over the past five years has shown and other proteins is crucial to Mr. and Mrs. John G. Searle. that a remarkable similarity ex- human health. Mutations in John Searle was the grand- ists between the simplest eukaryotic organisms, such as baker's proteins that control Cdk activ- son of the founder of the world- ity has been suspected in trigger- wide pharmaceutical company yeast, and much more complex ing certain types of cancer in G. D. Searle & Company. It was eukaryotic organisms, such as humans. Because of the similari- the Searle's wish that certain people. Yeast and humans use ties in the cell cycles of yeast and similar proteins to implement humans, funds be used to support "re- discoveries made by search in medicine, chemistry, and control the processes of the Deshaies's group will likely be and biological science." To cell cycle. applicable to people as well. Ba- achieve this goal, grants are One critical regulator of the sic research such as this on the made to support the indepen- cell cycle is an assembly of two cell cycle may eventually assist in dent research of outstanding in- different proteins called cyclin the development of innovative dividuals who are in the first or and cyclin-dependent kinase chemo-therapeutic treatments second year of their first appoint- (Cdk). Cyclin binds to Cdk and for cancer. ment at the assistant professor activates it, and Cdk then Deshaies graduated in 1983 level. switches on other proteins in the from Cornell University with Campus Notices Poll: Why Techers Chose Science by Dave Relyea ASCIT Election ASCIT General Election Monday, June 5th for Senior Class President, Senior class Secretary-treasurer, Junior class President, and Junior class Secretary-treasurer. Ballot boxes will be in the 7 houses from 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. on Monday. Please VOTE! McKinney Prizes Awarded The McKinney Committee of the Caltech Literature Faculty is pleased to announce the winners in the 1995 contest for excellence in writ-ing. In the category of non-fiction essay, first prize has been won by Lucia Kuhns. In the category of prose fiction, first prize is awarded to Connie Chang. Shameel Arafin won first prize in poetry. Honorable Mention is given to Alan McConchie, Ben Taskar, Serge Belongie, Donna Akutagawa, and Charles Boyce. Chamber Singers presents a Variety of Music Once again Caltech's own Chamber Singers is having a concert. This term, the program is eclectic. There will be madrigals, ballads, barbershop quartets, Gilbert and Sullivan songs, music from around the world, and a piece by the modern German composer, Distler. This free concert will be at 8:00 PM in Dabney Hall on June 8th, and a reception will follow. Come and enjoy! Disclaimer. I claim that I wrote down most everything that people gave me as an answer to this poll, except for the email which I printed, and that I'll try not to personally bias the data in any way, shape, or form. Fi-nally, I promised everyone that I wouldn't include any names in this survey. Therefore, the quotes that I use are genuine, but I unfortunately have too little time to find every single person who responded to this poll, so I'm going to enforce confidentiality. People who responded: 51 undergraduates 6 graduates (all levels of graduate work) 1 professor 1 other (no profession given) I didn't include my opinions and experiences. I was quite surprised that six graduate students (I expected about 0) sent me lengthy responses to this poll. I either talked to or received email from 51 undergraduates, about 6 percent of the undergraduate popu-lation. This number of people is not large enough to show trends in the motivations of undergraduates (fifty people is too few to justify global opinions, unless you're finding a movie at Block-buster, in which case five are usually too many). However, I be-lieye that the responses of these 59 people were interesting enough to merit a writeup. Nyah. I initially counted the number of responses in several SEE POLL PAGE 10 Friday, June 2, 1995 Gary Lorden presents Monwhea Jeng with the Sigma Xi Award. Sigma Xi Inducts Members by Jian Zhang Katherine Sippel, and Lyndie Williamson. Sigma Xi, a research honor society, held its annual banquet on Friday, May 19, to reunite present members and new initiates and to also inform all the members about the outreach programs student associate members plan to carry out during the next few years. During the initiation cer-emony, presided by Gary Lorden, the President of the Caltech Chapter, all the new initiates had to recite the pledge of the society. The new members pledged themselves with the purpose and objectives of Sigma Xi, which includes "...to encourage original investigations in science, to foster companionship and cooperation among scientists, to maintain honor, integrity and honesty in all scientific activities, and to assume the other continuing responsibilities of member-ship." Undergraduate initiates included Christopher Hunter, Debbie Leung, Penny Muir, Nathan Scandella, Adele Shakal, The Annual Sigma Xi Award given to a graduating senior who has carried out an outstanding piece of original scientific re-search, was awarded to Monwhea Jeng. A surprise appreciation plaque was awarded to Dr. William Whitney for his dedication to research and for his guidance and support to the Sigma Xi members who attended the National Conference on Undergraduate Research. All the members and guests at the banquet had the wonder ful opportunity to hear the guest speaker Julia Kornfield, Assistant Professor in Chemical Engineer-ing, give a short presentation about Long Molecules. Anandi Raman, a senior in biology and chemistry, also gave a short preview of the upcoming programs that the student members are currently planning. The out- reach programs target elemen-tary, junior high, and high school students in the nearby school districts. Three Techers Receive Awards by Suzette Cummings Nga Tran won the Arie J. Haagen-Smit Memorial Award, The Green, Froehlich, and Haagen-Smit Awards were presented on May 25, 1995 at a awards luncheon in The Ath-enaeum. Jerry Shan, Senior in Engineering, received the George W. Green Prize for his creative research in digital particle image velocimetry (DPIV) with Professor Morteza Gharib's group. The Jack E. Froehlich Memorial Award is for outstanding juniors in the top 5% of the class. Nam Yu and Roman Muchnik were selected this year. Thanh which is given to a chemist or biologist who has shown academic promise and has made recognized contributions to Caltech. The Dean of Students, Rod Kiewiet and Associate Dean, Barbara Green, hosted the lunch with special guests Mrs. George W. Green (Bernice), Mrs. Arie]. Haagen-Smit (Zus), Mrs. John D. Roberts (Edith), Professor Ray Owen, Assistant Professor Barbara Imperiali, and Charlene Chindlund from Donor Rela-tions. In This Issue: EDITORS' CORNER IHC MINUTES SOCIAL COMMENTARY MEDIA GUY CLASS ELECTION STATEMENTS THE MÖBIUS STRIP YNEWS ASCIT MINUTES FOXTROT CROSSWORD CRIME AND INCIDENT BEAT KREATIVE KORNER AVERY HOUSE UPDATE EVENTS & NOTICES 2 June 2, 1995 New Committee Officers The California Tech If not for your sake, then for his. Academic Policies Grievance Kohl Gill Adam Villani Lin Jia Pauline Ng Jian Zhang Alternate: Jason Lee Health Alternate: Adam Villani Angie Bealko Alternate: Thanh Nga Tran Advising System Suzie Bruch Housing Barbara Weir Adam Villani Johanna Yao Alternate. Penny Muir Alternate. Kiran Shekar Institute Programs Athletics & Lin Jia Physical Education Ellis Meng Chris Cary Alternate: Katie Stofer Library Abhijit Bhalla Curriculum Alternate: Lin Jia Kohl Gill Adam Villani Patents & Relations Alternate: Kiran Shekar With Industry Alternate. Thanh Nga Tran Venky Ganesan Alternate: Stephanie Haussman Educational Outreach Lin Jia Scholarships & Jason Lee Financial Aid Alternate: Angie Bealko Lin Jia Alternate: Penny Muir Michael Ru Ron Schaeffer Freshman Admissions Alternate: Leonard Sung Amy Herr Alternate: Jian Zhang Adil Karim Dave Relyea Undergraduate Academic Wes Salzillo Standards and Honors Alternate: Suzie Bruch Meg Crocker Alternate: Alison Slemp Eric Dickson Kim Komisarek Foreign Students Alternate. Emily Jennings Krishna Gidwani Alternate. Srdjan Sobajic Kanna Shimizu Alternate: Venky Ganesan Food Chair Alternate. Thanh Nga Tran Renny Talianchich. oncert CALTECH CHAMBER SINGERS VARIETY Contemporary Gilbert 8t Sullivan Trios Madrigals barbershop Songs in Russian Crote THURSdAY, JUNE 8, 8 pM DAbNEy LOUNGE FREE That's right! We need writers, copy-editors, layout editors, people who can draw, people who can't draw, dancers, happy people, unhappy people, people to clean up the office, people to clean up after the people who clean up the office, assignment editors, and YOU! WHITE HON THI TICH 12:15 Coffeehouse Fridays Editors' Corner From your Friendly Tech Editors Wow! What a week! The rumors about third term frosh burnout are true! Oh well, only one more week (rivit rivit). A few of our readers have expressed concern over the use of animals (cats in particular) in recent Tech ads and articles. First, we would like to say that the editors do not condone cruelty to animals, nor do we think that actual cruelty to ani- We have, however, played with irony in our advertisements, saying the opposite of what we would condone for the sake of humor. Our hopes were that readers would be surprised by the content, and that the shock might amuse them. Furthermore, Caltech students are generally very kind to their numerous pets (many of whom are cats), and would never think of hurting any of them. In other news, our Ditch Day pull-out has been put off again because we have not received many submissions. This is your last chance! Our last issue is next week and we want your Ditch Day abstracts! Please see page 9 for more details. See you next week! Deadlines for Submission to The Tech Letters to the Editor — 5 p.M. Monday Events and Notices - 5 p.M. Tuesday Unsolicited Articles — 5 p.м.. Tuesday Regular/Semi-Regular Columns — 5 p.м. Wednesday Articles, News Submissions — 5 p.м. Wednesday Art/Photo Submissions - 5 p.м. Thursday Work for The Tech! 3 units of PA15 and free food all in one! 12:15, Fridays, Coffeehouse The California ECH Caltech 40-58 SAC, Pasadena, CA 91125 onone. 10101 Js0-01os ernal edicors@tech.calecn.ecu DON UUUC- 1000 VOLUME XCVI, NUMBER 29 JUNE 2, 1995 Copy EDITor Shay Chinn Stephen Van Hooser EVENTS AND NOTICES rely violat BUSINESs MANAGER Francisco Gutiérre: CONSULTANT Wei-Hwa Huang STArt WRITERS Zack Berger Michael Kantner FEATURE WaTERS Zack Berger Wei-Hwa Huang novelt Koss saM Adam Villani nover omsor Lydia Mcra Laura Brady David Relyea rogner Munte sregnen van Moose Kichare chola ADVISOR Hall Daily Published weckly except dur- ine vacation and examination pertod: by the Associated Students of the California Institute of Technology, Inc. stricuy ulose of me authors Letters and announcemen include the author's name and phone nuloet and me inicnoca dato nub caton. submit cony brererahl on Macintosh 3.5" disk) to the Tech coltors reserve the right to colt and abridge all submissions for literacy, ex-pediency, etc. All articles are the prop- ce or me atmos. nuthots and cos umnists retam an inichecual prop erty rights. Tech is distrib uted free. Issues will be mailed off carous unon recentor all nervea ration costs. Printed by News-Type Service, Glendale. The California Tech IHC Minutes: 5/30/95 Present: Tom (chair), Laura (sec-retary), Adil (Ru), Alison (BI), Bill (Da), Brian (Fl), Art (Ri), David Derkitts (Pa), Micah Barclay (LI), Brian Winters, Peter Manca The dual absence of Nestor and Vogel is noted, if it weren't Maria's birthday we'd suspect something. Nestor's perfect attendance record is broken. Tom was asked about cable TV and wants to know if anyone has any info about it, Brian says he thinks most housing run property will get it, but is unsure. Since 150 is managed by property management and not housing it may not get cable. The Interhouse trophy is MIA, we make a motion, the vote passes to make it non-RFable in the future, providing it returns in some incarnation. Peter Manca tells us the BOD would like people from other houses besides Blacker doing ASCIT movies stuff. • Please tell the game refs when you reschedule a game. We discuss frosh numbers, and Summer SURF students are fudged into spaces. That's all folks! Respectfully submitted, Laura Brady, IHC Secretary It Was Much Better Back When We Wrote the Title: A Social Commentary by J. Random HercFrosh III and Lauren Today's target: Social Commentary OK. here's the deal... our contract has not been renewed for next term (by edict of the editors). (This is a unsubstantiated rumor. -eds.) So, this is our final article. For all time. For ever. For always. You get the idea. Anyway, we're outa here after this article, and we would just like to say, "<expletive deleted> off!" So with no further ado: This space for rent. Call (818) 395 - 6153 between 8 a.m. and 12 a.m. Ask for Wei-Hwa. Your ad here. If you lived here, you'd be home by now. Baby on board. How's my driving? Call: 1(800)EAT-<expletive deleted>. got nilk? THEATRE ARTS CALIFORNIA INSTITUTE OF TECHNOLOGY Presents ASSASSINS June 2, 1995 3 ADAM VILLANI: MEDIA GUY by Adam Villani Assassins TACIT's new production of Steven Sondheim's Assassins is not a Broadway show, but for an amateur production, it's pretty good. As sassins takes as its subject the myriad American presidential assassins and would-be assassins and tries to find out what makes them tick. Unfortu-nately, it doesn't get much more insightful than "they do it to get attention," which is something I could've told you. It's certainly more original an idea than most musicals, and one does get a certain thrill from seeing footnotes of history come to life. With TACIT's limited budget, though, the result is good performances, interesting staging (in Dabney Lounge), and a whirlwind tour through American history, guided by a bunch of people from John Wilkes Booth to John Hinckley who are, for the most part, in-sane. Particularly charismatic is Craig Peterson as Charles Guiteau, the man who shot James Garfield because he wanted to be ambassador to France. The two women who tried to shoot Gerald Ford, played by Lara Hughes and Lynne Cooper, share a great scene, perhaps the comic high point, where they discover they both know Charles Manson. Ted Turócy does a fine job as Sam Byck, the man who tried to crash a 747 into Dick Nixon's White House, but he can't save his scenes from the fact that they seem to have been written in a calculated attempt to bring the tempo of the production to a grinding halt. As an extra note, the costuming was excellent at establishing the character and time period of each assassin; many were instantly recognizable. See Assassins; you'll like it. June 2 and 3 at 8 p.m., June 4 at 2 p.m. Tickets $10, $6 for students, call the ticket office at (818) 395-4652 or (800) 423-8849. ASCIT FRIDAY NIGHT MOVIE KENNETH BRANAGH RICHARD BRIERS - MICHAEL KEATON ROBERT SEAN LEONARD KEANU REEVES LEMMA THOMPSON DENZEL WASHINGTONK Music and Lyrics by Stephen Sondheim Book by John Weidman ASSASSINS is based on an idea by Chanes Gilbert Play writes mortions, foc. New york city produced May 26, 27/28 dune 2,3 at 8/0m. May 29, June 4 at 2 pm Dabney Lounge on the Caltech Campus Caltech Ticker omce 3323 Michigan Ave. Pasadena 800-423-8819 818-395-4652 FAX 818-795-1378 TDD 818-395-3700 sam - 4pm Monday through Friday email: tickets@caltech.edu no interpreta tot eweling dys arance $10 general admission $6 students with ID group rates available and toreroenormance materials are supphed by weatnin avenue. New York. ty. 1001я لرد اللا MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING BAXTER LECTURE HALL 7:30 & 10:00 P.M. $1.50 for ASCIT members $2.00 for others Next Week Dustin Hoffman in Outbreak LAEMMLE THEATRES ESQUIRE 2670 E. Colorado Blvd. (818) 793-6149 Gerard Depardieu Roman Polanski COLORADO 2588 E. Colorado Bivd. (818) 796-9704 A Pure Formality Daily 4:30, 7:00, 9:30 p.m. Sat-Mon Bargain Matinee 2:00 p.m. RED FIRECRACKER GREEN FIRECRACKER Daily 5:00, 7:30, 10:00 p.m. Sat-Mon Bargain Matinee 2:30 p.m. 4, Lune 2, 1995 The Cahforma lech 1995 CLASS ELECTION STATEMENTS Junior Class Offices President sophomore event and to obtain an interesting commence- Gina Serraiocco Hello, sophomore bud-dies! I'm running for Junior Class President because I know I would do a great job with Mudeo and finding a commencement speaker. was ASCIT Frosh Director last year, and I really liked being involved with Caltech and representing my class. I hope you all give me a chance to do it again! Thanks! ment speaker. As you can already see from the scenario I have presented above, I will not allow the commencement speaker to be some Joe-noth-ing who just happens to be available. Caltech is an extremely prestigious institute. We should therefore be able to attract world class commencement speakers. Further, for too many years MUDEO has been a sparsely attended waste of Secretary/Treasurer time. If elected Junior Class Secretary/Treasurer, I would attempt to solve this problem. Dave Bacon Graduation '97. After a last minute bout with the registrar over counting Ph 2c for advanced humanities credit, you've finally managed to scramble together enough units (of pain?) to graduate. You've gotten job offers from two non-fast-food companies and have been accepted to attend grad school at Po-dink U. You've purchased a spiffy graduation gown and one of those cool square graduation caps. Your whole family is in town to witness your triumphant graduation from Tech. Everything is real smooth. Imagine then your disbelief upon showing up at commencement ready for a perfect graduation, opening the commencement program, and discovering that the commencement speaker is to be none other than Edgar lam Boring, author of "1001 ways clip your toenails", giving his commencement address on "Toenail Clipping Method Number 555: Use Scissors." The horror! The Junior Class Secre-tary/Treasurer, along with the Junior Class President together have two main respon-sibilities: to organize a fresh-man-sophomore event (MUDEO) and to select the commencement speaker. If elected Junior Class Secretary Treasurer, I would strive to both improve the freshman- MUDEO has the potential to be an extremely exciting event. As Ruddock House Vice President I am currently responsible for organizing alley challenges. From this job, I have learned many things that make or break events such as MUDEO. Probably the most important step in organizing such an event is the input of the students. Students will not show up for events which they do not find interesting. If I can discern that no one wants to have MUDEO, then I feel that another event should be scheduled. Above all, I hope to make the freshman-sopho-more event exciting and entertaining for all. Finally, I feel that I am qualified to do an excellent job as Junior Class Secretary/ Treasurer. I am currently the Vice President of Ruddock House, will be a freshman camp UCC, and am a member of the ARC. I have represented Ruddock at IHC meetings and love interacting with other houses at Interhouse events. (On a side note, my last name is a food item, which should count for something also. [grin]) Along with this ex-perience, I also hope to bring my enthusiasm and dedication to this office. Thank you for your time. I hope that you will give me your vote. Dave 'Baco' Bacon. Senior Class Offices President that I would neglect to be re-speaker, we can. No sponsible and available to the Angie Marie Bealko senior class. I don't have an longer need we settle for trustees or friends of the I like watching the sun- agenda of my own to push or esteemed Institute. (How- rise over the Atlantic ocean any favors to return. I plan on ever, if some horrendous, on a crisp summer morning. reflecting student opinion to insurmountable obstacle I like playing golf in the rain the best of my ability and pre-forces us to do just this, I when everyone else has gone senting an articulate and ratio-would vote for Arnold home. I like the smell of the nal argument to the committee Beckman. Afterall, it grass after I've spent hours on behalf of the individual that would be nice to see the mowing it. I like counting we want to speak at our com- man behind the name.) the syllables of sentences in mencement. Our current class Furthermore, I will do my my head. I like eating a warm officers have been gathering in- best to convince the cho- soft pretzel covered with formation for some time now sen speaker why he or she cheese. I like dancing and I am confident that we will should come to Caltech. around my room listening to be able to present an informed (Unfortunately, we will not country music. I like talking and unified opinion when the be able to throw on a sham trash with my friends on the time comes. I feel very strongly such as Pre-frosh weekend, basketball court. I like shuck- that I would be an effective but I will try my best.) If ing corn and picking toma- voice for the senior class. My you are a senior from any toes from my garden. I like years at Tech have been very of the fine houses (and if to smile and laugh and sing. special to me and I hope to con-you aren't, why are you That's me. Simple. What tinue working to make our ex- reading this?) and you else is there to say after three perience something that we can share my vision, I am open years? If you don't know me; all be proud of. I look forward to any and all ideas you maybe you know a little more to working with the entire se- have about who you want about me now. And for one nior class to make our final year to give us our last "lecture" last hurrah and chuckle, I unforgettable. Thank you. at Caltech and what would won't resign...so vote for me. make graduation more Secretary/Treasurer enjoyable. Finally, as Se- Adil Karim nior Class Secretary/Trea- The senior class presi- Suzie Bruch surer, I will help choose an dent has two main duties; set- I have a vision. All of my appropriate date such that ting the date of Ditch Day classmates are gathered to- even the most scrupulous and "helping" to determine gether in the Court of Man, Ditch Day watchers will be the form of the commence-decked in graduation garb. unable to predict this gala ment exercises. I should not The sun beats down on us as the event. have any difficulty with the mercury tops 100°F (or 37.8°C "Without a plan, there first issue. For me, every day or 311K for the true scientists is no attack; without attack, is Ditch Day. The commence- in the audience). Sweat pours no victory." I have a plan ment ceremony is a subject of down our bodies, as if we were and I have an attack. Your great importance to the se not uncomfortable enough in vote for me will not sym- nior class. It signifies that our our once-a-year dress duds. But bolize a personal victory work here is done. After the we neither notice nor care. for me, but rather a victory ceremony, we will have only Why, you ask. How is this pos- for us as a class. our loans to remind us of the sible? We are so enamored by years we spent here. But I our graduation speaker, so en- would also like the com- thralled by his or her words, mencement ceremony itself excited that this message will Alison Slemp Who do you think should speak at commencement? to linger in our memories. stay with us and make this day We all feel that the students truly memorable. Our friends should have a greater say in at other schools will envy us. determining the graduation They will not deem it fair that speaker. The issue that re- our Commencement address: mains is how to convincingly was actually good, while theirs present our case to the con- aided the process - of sleep. vocation committee. I feel Aaahhh, my friends. This is my that I would be an excellent vision — to have graduation be choice to represent the se- exciting (or at least mildly en- nior class in this matter. I tertaining). I will use my pow- have a great deal of experi- ers of persuasion to help oth- ence in dealing with the ad-ers on the committee see my ministration. But I am not so vision. If we believe we can get much of a political animal a good, energetic, entertaining C. David Letterman D. None of the above Seriously, though. 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Bring Them to the Caltech Bookstore (Winnett Student Center) June 13-15 Tuesday - Thursday 9:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m. June 2, 1995 THE TWISTED IDEAS WITH A STRAIGHT EDGE OBIUS TRIP by Rob Rossi English, the Irrational Tongue - Let's face it, gang: English is a silly language. There aren't any rules...but English teachers make us learn a bunch of them anyway, which work less often than not. I particularly recall "i before e, except after c, or in words that sound like sleigh, or weigh, or in combination with a, or on Wednesday, and Thursday, and odd days in May, and (hey) you'll always be wrong, no matter what you say." It was a little confusing. Having struggled through learning several significantly GMAT LSAT more "rational" languages, and having taught English as a second language, I can really identify with those trying to pick up our lingo, especially in regard to scientific terms. I don't have any good suggestions for you, though. Sorry. There's no se- cret logic... there is no logic! Parenthetically, my sincere thanks to Markus Weber, one of my roommates and a native of Germany, for inspiring the following diatribe. Some time ago Markus asked me "What is a Frosh?" After I explained, he replied "Ah, that funny..."frosh" means "frog" in German." (I'm glad he asked before Tadpole Weekend.) One thing that people using English as a second language almost always have trouble with is hyphenation. Hey, most natives have to look up the syllabication of some words-is there any rhyme or reason to it? I thought not, but Markus (a computer science guy) has studied the algorithms in the powerful typesetting system "TEX," and he reports that the program actually empirically calculates the hyphenation of most words. The algo- rithm "looks like some kind of meta-physics," however. He tried to explain it, but I got lost. Suffice it to say that the method was developed at Stanford by Frank M. Liang in 1982, as part of his Ph.D. thesis in computer science. If you are interested, look at Appendix Il in the TEX manual-it's all there. That brings me to my personal crusade. Well, maybe it's just the chip on my shoulder, call it what you like. 1, 2, and 3. Yeah. Not 1, 2 and 3, mind you. 1, 2, and 3. Most people in science circles get it right, thank-fully. But you can pick up several serious national monthly newsmagazines and find it all MCAT GRE The Test Secrets during our TEST STRATEGY EVENT • Learn what the test-makers don't want you to know! • Hear expert advice on what schools are really looking for. • Get Kaplan's Top Ten Tips for test day. • Learn test strategies from star teachers. Space is limited! Call now to reserve your seat! Saturday, June 24 & Sunday, June 25 Downtown LA. • Encino • Riverside Santa Barbara • Westwood plus more dates and locations to choose from! Call: 1-800-KAP-TEST get a higher score KAPLAN wrong! Wrong? Conventional wisdom is that you can enumerate a list in written form as either 1, 2, and 3, or 1, 2 and 3. But only the first makes common sense. Why? Let me quote the eloquent explanation in Technical Reporting, 3'd Ed., by Joseph N. Ulman, Jr. and Jay R. Gould: Unless you put a comma before the conjunction in every series, you will sometimes confuse your read-ers. Suppose you write: Electric lenses were de veloped by Davisson and Calbrick, Knoll and Ruska and Bruche This is evidently meant to be a three-member series...but does Ruska belong with Knoll or with Bruche? Two other examples are given by Ulman and Gould that make the point even more strongly. I'll omit their explanation as I think you can see the problems yourself: 1. If we have subdivisions of X, Yand Z, whose values are known... 2. A sampling device is made up of two cascaded components, a sampling switch and a cascaded holding device. Are you confused yet? If you use the 1, 2, and 3 enumeration scheme, probably not. But the sentences above are vague at best if you can't trust that their writers consistently use that "extra" comma. So from now on, please, make the world a better (or at least clearer) place and stick in an "extra" comma, if you aren't doing it already! It'll lower my blood pressure. Not that I won't die before 30 anyway... Puzzler #2 - If there was any hard-core engineer left in me, I'd look up the solution to the last Puzzler. It has to be somewhere, The California Tech right? (Not ALL engineering is done by the book of course...but a reference-based solution is pragmatically ie-quired in most engineering work, and that's what drove me out of the field into science. Hey, I'm only so pragmatic.) Last time we puzzled you with triangle ABC, lying on rays A, B, and C, emanating from a camera. Well, the computers are still thinking about it. Of the many people who've fed this problem to a computer, each using a different algorithm, I don't know of anyone who got something meaningful out of it. No analytical solutions were sent in, so I'll do my best with my paper triangle and string answers. For any set of three points, there is the special case where the "so-lution" points are all equidistant from the camera, for which there is only one solution. In every other case I've tested, symmetry or no. there are two solutions Whatever solution point is clos est to the camera in one case is furthest from it in the other. If it is not required that the rays be non-identical, more two-solution cases are generated; three identical rays put the one solution at an infinite distance, which is getting mathematically obtuse and so I'll stop there. This issue's new puzzler is also science...and a question of ingenuity. You have gotten in a heated debate with the local science teacher on an isolated is-land. He has been telling his students that salt water is less dense than fresh water, and insists he is right. There's plenty of fresh SEE MOBIUS PAGE 10 YNEWS by Donna Ebenstein This Friday we have yet another noon concert, this time by a campus band. Dave Liney and the Line Monsters will be playing in front of Winnett, so bring your lunch out and enjoy the sun and the music. Decompression is coming!!! Decompression will be on June 10th and 11th - free food and entertainment in front of Winnett. Sign-ups to volunteer will be in the student houses this week. Sign up, help out, and get a free t-shirt. As always, the YExcomm meets every Monday from 12 p.m. to 1 p.m. in the Y Lounge (2nd floor of Winnett). If you're interested in finding out more about the Y feel free to drop in. Do you think your $$ time is worth more $$ than $8.00/br? Then become a salesman for the California Tech !!! Because your time is a scarce resuorce, invest it wisely, and earn the money you really deserve !! Earn up to 25% commission on sale of advertising space to local businesses. FOI additional information, give Francisco a call at s6154 and leave a message on the answering machine. The California Tech June 2, 1995 7 ASCIT Minutes: 5/24/95 Present: Thomas Maccarone, David Relyea, Kanna Shimizu, Greg Steiert, Laura Munoz, Andrew Huntington, Flora Ho, Jon McDunn, Ken Walsh, James Honaker, Darth Vader, and Ernie. • Not Present: Everyone else, including but not limited to the immediate family of Tom, James' cat, and James Stewart (we think he's dead). • The Meeting starts at 4:05 p.m. Andrew Huntington acquires a third term Multihouse funding check from Kanna Shimizu for Ricketts House for BDR + some F (how much F, we don't know). • Jon McDunn achieved a point total of 579,000,000 while playing the video game "Jurassic Park." • Flora Ho and others have altered some Grievance Committee procedures, but the changes to the procedures have not been passed. • ASCIT Teaching Awards are up. Vote for your favorite teacher. Make Ken smile. • Jon requests the opinions of the members of the BOD toward acquiring an ASCIT logo by means of a community competi-tion. Jon says that Tom Lechner might be able to do it. The logo would need to contain the word "ASCIT" and not appear to be a small map of Venezuela. @ The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy yellow dog. • Tom mentions that the senior class president might be given the task of finding out if seniors want to destroy things for their stacks that aren't theirs. For ex-ample, the pyramid underneath Baxter was destroyed on Ditch Day, and several people have complained. Some people add that it might be difficult for the president to find out what stacks are destroying things, but the BOD likes the idea. What if seniors want to destroy the bust of justice, or the carpet in Lloyd? Oops. Too late. e Dinah Lee Schaller's office was flooded, and she needs an office for the summer. Jon tells the BOD that Student Affairs asked to use ASCIT's office - the BOD is generally against this. Sure. Steal our homes and work-places. Beat our swords into plowshares! We Will Endure! James failed to find the oper ating budget for the Tech. Whether an operating budget exists is uncertain at this point. James mentioned briefly to ev eryone that he'll seek out Gavin later. James adds that the BOC is $2100 in the red (and $6 in the green). With the $1500 from this year, the BOC will only be $600 (or $800, actually, due to a $200 expenditure) in debt. As the BOC has no outside account, any money put into the BOC's account at this point will just go to paying off the debt. Thus, James requests a cash loan of $500 from ASCIT for BOC operating expenses (and it is approved 5-0-2 = $3) • The Dean has requested a blurb in the Student Handbook to the effect of: "If you have an account at another bank besides the Caltech Credit Union, the Credit Union will charge you a service fee." → Sharon Slavin met with Dan Bridges to see if Student Affairs can help us with Ath Funding. → Lloyd House has no third term House List. Suck. Page House has a fax machine. Double suck. The Interhouse Trophy was stolen from Fleming and has since been seen in the steam tunnels, in Outer Mongolia, and possibly orbiting Callisto: Fleming has consulted SEDS about building a rocket, and the launch is scheduled for sometime in 1998. @ Laura says the Van is happy and collects litter.. Obviously, she's lost her mind. Vans can't be happy, Laura. Dave adds that the copier has trouble printing double-sided copies. Everyone else Dave has talked to says that the copier prints double sided copies just fine. Dave is jinxed. Greg told the Ath that 118 people will attend the Formal. Greg also wants to give out money every weekend for social events, like the Jim Pierce Scavenger Barbecue first term and Foodeo third term. = Ken wants people to talk to the registrar about the new rule stopping me and maybe other students but I'm not sure from taking Math 112 and Physics 106 at the same time because they OVERLAP BY 1/2 AN HOUR ON MONDAY. (They made a rule just to do this. They don't like me.) Ken also would like to know exactly who the registrar got to pass this rule. @ Tom adds that the IHC is working on the railroad, and on summer housing problems. We need 52 spaces for non-Caltech students. The IC will also stop people from getting screwed over in picking rank in other houses if their house is being renovated. • Kanna says that a lot of clubs haven't picked up their checks, and if they don't by drop day, they lose. Drop Day was Wednesday. Contact Kanna if you want to beg and plead with her to give you the money that you were late in col-lecting. Kanna adds that the Totem needs more money, because Thanh-Nga Tran (who has since disappeared and has been seen off-campus and in the steam tun-nels) said the Totem would be getting bigger this year. @ Dave says that elections for class officers will be held on Monday after Memorial Day. Candidates should put their statements and a list of their favorite people in the Tech by Wednesday. FoxTrot by Bill Amend Merry ha, hey lie ids fleas woes wide has Know TALIND BEEP. NO ERRORS WANT TO FEE! SUPERIOR TO A ASKED YOU TO NOT FINISH THE MILK! AND DIDN'T! HONEST! I SWEAR! SEE? THERE'S YOU KNOW, IT'S KIDS AT LEAST FIVE SIX DROpS If Farmer Bob's field meters, and s-mr. JASON, WHAT'S 346264338327950 1094204744445492 078164062862089.. IS THIS MY HEE HEE A5 9O1A VERY SMAKT MOVE, ROGER. Are Yot ADDING P IT'S BRILLIANT! GUARANTEE YOU'LL BE SLEEPIN NoW, YOU I'M BEGINNING TO SEE WHI YOU DONTIKE PLAYING THE COMPUTER ON THE SOFA EVERY NIGH THIS WEEK IF I SLEEP OVER AT MARCUS I SUPPOSE JASON IT'LL BE PRETTY CLEAR IN THERE NON？ I GUESS. TOMORRON MIGHT EVERY SHOT SEEMED TO GON HOW WAS OUR GOLF GAME? ROGER, THAT'S GREAT! NOMAKE INTO RAI INTO THE PRO SHOP... GAME YOUR I'LL DESCRIBI GAME MI WAY MICRO TRENDS MAY HAVE WHAT YOU NEED! Write for The Tech WEDO REPAIRS! dwharzen دهم٥ for Toshiba, compar, AST, & This is as anal as I get. David Relyea ASCIT Secretary CHECK OUT OUR MAY SPECIAL ON TOSHIBA NOTEBOOKS! RosePhoto 30 Minute Quality Photo Finishing • 30 Min. Wallet To 6 x 8 • Color, B/W Enlargement Up To 30 × 40 • Slide Processing And Duplicating • Negative From Photos / Slides • Passport Photos / Fax Service • Photo Supplies & Xerox Copies Open 7 Days Tel/Fax (818) 584-0988 528 S. LAKE AVE • PASADENA 10% Discount For Caltech Students w/ Ad Free Parking in rear T-2100M, 486dx2-50mhz, 4mb RAM, 1.44 fd, 250 mb hd... T-2100CS, 486dx2-50mhz, 4mb RAM, 1.44 fd, 330mb hd bbb..... T-2100CT, 8 mb, 330 mb hd, 1.44 fd, 330 mb hd, active matrix.. .$1395.00 .$2159.00 1160/0.00 T-2150CDT, 8mb, 500 mb hd, built in cd-rom, 1.44 f, d/w/m..... Call for other models of Toshiba NBS, accessories, and upgrades. We have in stock Compaq, HP, Cannon printers, and other name brand products. Corporate PO's are we ceme We accept VISA, MasterCard, and Discover! (818) 799-4556 Micro Trends 1010 S. Arroyo Pky., #5 Pasadema, CA 91105 FAX (818) 799-5507 & June 2, 1995 DILBERT by Scott Adams I'VE DECIDED TO or MorLUrA HANDS-ON MOVE THE MOUSE. OVER Mont NOW CLICK IT!! CLICK IT!! 1// NO!!! YOU FOOL!!! THLS MAS "LONG DAY" WRITTEN ALL Bye, Seniors! HAVE YOU TAKEN THE CMNURICHT IAALNINE rOK BOSiNeS TIHICSA VO. BUT IF YOU ORTLUD MEN YOULL SAVE SOME ON TRAINING WHICH YOU CAN NO UCCONAIT YOUk OFFICE LockiLtrs TAKEN THE TRAINING 1DCLr SENSE ANY- urb. HEY! THAT LITTLE wiurch wonL Luen ٥ ٤٤٨٢ ٨١٣٤ IT GIVES ME AN EMOTIONAL LIFT TO HAVE YOUR LACWI NFAREY (I NEVER WHAT HE tnuwent STOP DROPPING, ,IN LIKE THAT!! MY CELLULAR PHONE AND LAPTOP COMPUTER ALLOW MIC TU WONA ANT IINE AND ANYPLACE. WHELE DRIVING?) TOO DANGEROUS IN RESTAURANTS?) | TOO RUDE OUTDOORS? BASICALLY, YOU LUG THEM AROUND AND WOKKY THAT THEYLL GET STOLEN OR BROKEN STOP IT. YOute SCARING WHAT'S LISA NL run I THINK IT'S SUr1D INL C-MAiL FhOM MUMAN RESOURCES SAID ALL SHORT EMPLOYEES MUST WEAR THESE TO IMPROVE YaOLDILitY nihutr THE CUBICLE AISLES. HR SHOULD CHANGE ALiK TRoSWOrY ONCE IN A WHILE. ILL BET WECAN MANL HIM WEAR ALUMINUM FOIL PANTS. HERE'S YOUR LATEST BUDGE CUTS Doi rarhon wotd KNL TEE MESTENLER FROM FINANCE, HA HA!! I RECOMMENDED A 20% CUT. A QUICK GLANCE AROUND THE ROOM TELLS ME YOURE NOT ON THE OULCOS VICIOK ANNJO SO NOTHING LOST. Across Popeye's favorite tuber? 5. Mountain in the Bible 10. Little bits 14. Let out 15. Babylonian abode of the dead 16. :"Dies 17. Genius in the field 18. . Actor Novarro 19. Insect 20. The seniors who are leaving 23. Was Latin 24. There's a lot of it regarding nothing 25. Brit's grits? 28. Problems with getting 10-Down? 33. cochere 34. Prefix for centric or stile 35. Where you might hear a 57-Down 36. peanut butter sand- wiches!" 37. Bad feelings 40. Why telnet sessions take so long 41. Owner of the best WWW page at Caltech 43. Attachment 44. Armadillo 46. What a senior at Caltech is likely to be 48. They roll 49. " culpa" 50. Din 51. When most of the seniors leave 59: French mine 60. Giver 61. Island of color 62. Softest mineral on earth 63. Act well 64. Miniature slide? 65. What the WWW page in 41-Across deals with 66. British levels 67. Woman's retort Come to the Caltech Bookstore for all your Commencement Day Memories • Diploma frames (in three different styles) • Leather diploma covers • Ph.D. Hoods • Caltech photo albums • and much more On Commencement Day don't forget film, disposable cameras and cold drinks. The California Tech Crossword edited by Wei-Hwa Huang 14 17 20 15 28 10 11 12 13 [16 19 21 22 23 24 $25 26 27 32 35 40 145 28 29 30 (31 33 34 37 41 42 38 43 39 44 46 47 48 49 50 51 57 52 53 54 55 |56 58 62 59 60 64 63 66 Down 1. Thugg? 2. River in Siberia Cetus sun What the seniors will soon cease to be 5. Annoy, like the X-Men Chief editor? What the valedictorian does 7. Branches 8. College in NC 9. Screwed-up place? 10. What all the seniors try to get 11. Integral 12. Dances in Bologna 13. It's said there are seven of them 21. Those for whose benefit a suit is brought 22. B fore? 25. Flood 26. : 27. Prefix for e or utang 28. German engraver 29. Press 30. Italian bazaar 31. "On 32. Bjorn's stuff 34. Strange sounding lake? 38. Herb 39. Looked in an ASCIT meeting 42. Deal 45. Redcaps 47. French born 48. Measures 50. God did it again 51. Carrie 52. Sharif or Khayya'm 53. A senior has a 1/8 chance of being this 54: Valentine's affliction 55. Descendant of Adam 56. I'm glad I use it 57. Part of 35-Across 58. "Owwww!" May 9 Theft Car Radio Victim parked his 1992 Toyota Camry in the Wilson lot on May 8, at 5:00 p.m. Upon returning Crime and Incident BEAT to his vehicle on May 9, at 8:45 p.m., he discover his radio miss-ing. No evidence of forced entry was observed on the vehicle. Pasadena Police Department notified. "estaurad * * Award Winner * A May 12 Mandarin Cuisine & Seafood Cocktail Lounge Lunch Speciais $450 11.30-3 p.m. Early Bird Specials $5°5 3-7 p.m. Classic Dinners 3=10 p.m. Damage Victim parked his 1993 Toyota Tercel in space #229 Wilson Structure at about 8:00 p.m. on May 10. Upon returning to his vehicle on May 12 at 8:00 p.m., he discovered a dent in his vehicle on the right side. May 14 Food To Go Welcome OPEN 7 DAYS Tel: 449-8018 2475 E. Colorado • Pasadena between Sierta Madre Blvd. & Altadena Dr. Vandalism Security responded to Ricketts House at 2:10 a.m., where it was reported that graffiti had been written in room T2 (restroom), room #56, and the stairwell wall near room #56. The California Tech June 2, 1995 9 Submit Ditch Day Abstracts! We've received fewer than 10 stack abstracts! Please, if you want your stack to be included in our Ditch Day layout (which has been delayed two weeks already), send us an abstract (editors@tech). Here's a sample of what we're looking for... Bob's Stack Underclassman went to the ends of the earth to solve Bob's Stack. While hanging off of Millikan library to read a clue printed on the seventh floor, something flew out of Beckman Institute and latched onto Bill's neck and wouldn't let go. And, in the end, everyone had to laugh because, what was that thing? Bill, swinging from Millikan library, is attacked by a "thing." Breative Forner grasping id weaves ichor stained webs around fallen sattva Kreative Korner Policy twisted soul smiles anguished grimace for perfume stench Guidelines for Submissions. r photographs. Essayists are encourage ubmissions are geneal coe works such to ana it, i dech Mos, carton ston probably belong in the Inside World. All submissions must be in by the Tuesday preceding the issue in which the submission is to appear. 2. ubmissions may not contain libelous material without consent of those being libeled. It the responsibility of the author(s) to check on this fact. uspicious submissions will not t printed. 3. Submissions may not contain vulgarities. The editor has judgement on what constitutes a vulgarity. Submissions must be turned in by e-mail, Macintosh disk, or 3.5" high-density IBM compat- ible disk. 5. All submissions will be submitted to the Totem after publication unless explicit instruction is given by the authors) to the editors to the contrary. The author must be part of the Caltech/JPL community. Certain waivers for alumni, friends of the community, etc. may be made at the editor's discretion. 7. The editor reserves the right to edit, shorten, disallow any submission, or take exceptions to these rules. thanatos embraces chill solace from pain of enlightenment shadowy dreams entice nostalgic seductions by wraiths of memory broken heart rages what once was will never be by Ben Williamson Ruddock Library at 10:00 a.m. Victim notice the back pack missing at 4:00 p.m. May 19 May 21 instructed that they were on private property and would have to Suspicious Odor leave immediately. Subjects com- Security responded to a report plied. Subjects were not Caltech of a smell of natural gas in the affiliated Noyes Laboratory, Upon arrival, the building was evacuated and May 23 the Pasadena Gas company were notified. nvestigation a gas can was disco red in room #15. Gas can w removed from the area. May 24 Lost Property Victim left two card-board boxes containing personal property in the hall-way of the Fleming house near room #21 2:00 a.m. Victim notice the boxes missing at 10:00 a.m. Grand Theft Auto Blue Chevy Pick-Up Truck, valued at $9,000, was taken from Arden Street just south of the Health Center. Victim parked his vehicle at 12:30 p.m. Upon returning at 3:00 p.m., discovered the vehicle missing. Pasadena Police Department notified. May 22 Suspicious Odor Security responded to a report of a smell of gasoline in the Physical Plant Building. Upon further Lost Property Victim lost a set of keys on a blue plastic key ring. Victim notice keys missing at 6:30 p.m. Victim believed that they were lost near the Beckman Institute. Unauthorized Access Security responded to a report of kids riding bikes in the Moore construction area. Subjects were Damage Victim parked her 1994 Gray Volvo on the south side of Tour- May 15 nament Park Lot at 3:15 p.m. Upon returning at 5:05 p.m. no- Vandalism ticed the antenna up and bro- Victim reported an attempted ken. No other damage reported break-in to his car the night of May 14. Victim parked his 1991 Volvo 240 in the 1100 block of Blanche at 8:00 p.m. Upon returning to his vehicle on May 15, at 7:15 a.m. he discovered the lock on the driver's side of the vehicle damaged. No other lost was reported. May 18 Theft Victim placed a back pack in the Vandalism Security responded to an attempted auto break-in, east of Brown Gym in the Tournament Park lot. Witness reported seeing a male kneeing next to a brown Porsche 944. The vehicle's passenger side window was broken out. All units dispatched, suspect was no longer in the area. Witness reported seeing suspect leave in a gold and brown, ford Maverick. Pasadena Police Department notified. World Vista Travel 150 S. Los Robles Pasadena, CA 91101 (818) 577 - 1220 Corporate, Leisure, Cruise, Groups and Tours Special Discounts for Cal. Tech Students and Faculty Guaranteed Lowest Fares Coucon $89 DAILY WEAR SOFT CONTACT LENSES Includes: Exam, Filling and Follow Up Reg. $130 Selected Brands Only With Coupon Oniv. Not Valid with OPTOMETRISTS Dr. Alan Siegel DASADENA an Uniomerre cory Dr. Svetlana Fisher (818) 577-7205 Ynur Our Doctors Prescription illed ONE HOUR SERVICE LAB ON PREMNESS ONE MOUR STRUCE AROST CAST OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK Coupon $99 EXAM, FRAME & LENSE Reg. $159 We feature the ReNu® regimen by Bausch & Lomb The easiest way to Single Vision • Choose From Our Specia Selection of Frames With Coupon Oniv. Not Valid wit! 10 Lune 2, 1995 MÖBIUS and salty water around, but no books on the topic, or balances or measuring devices accurate enough to convince him he's wrong. However, he does have a lump of clay that floats easily in water. Using this clay and a small pebble from the beach, there's an easy way to demonstrate this small density difference. What Shameless Shareholders - Two weeks ago I attended a really good William Bennett Munro Memorial Philosophy Seminar presented by professor Christopher Kutz of UC-Berkeley. though in this limited space I can't do justice to the philosophical argument he was advancing, his talk got me thinking about the stock market. I'm already a target of the Stock-Market Anti-Defamation Lawyers Lawn-Bowl-ing Club, so I figure I may as well were originally developed as a means for individual entrepreneurs to raise the capital needed to turn their good ideas into re- Such entrepreneurs would sell stock to people who believed in them and their product idea; nobody was fool enough to buy them based on anything else. Rarely did shareholders view the stock market as an investment engine, and most people held their stocks until markets and government regulation were introduced mainly to reduce the costs associated with investment contracts and keeping track of investors. Corporations usually started small and companies didn't "go public" — they started that way. ness capital has changed incredibly since then. These days most shareholders in any given company have at best only a glimmer corporations are wholly-owned subsidiaries of other corpora-tions, and companies choose incorporation primarily for the legal and financial protection it grants the people who's money is invested in them. Rarely do companies start out public nowadays - entrepreneurs have to put up their own money and get market doesn't do its original job anymore. True, it still raises capital and divides risk - but that SERVING CALTECH Authorized Agents for Airlines, RAULEI LIE DICHINES The Finest in Professional Travel Services (818) 795-0291 45001-78 CAMPUS EXTENSION (octween El Molino & Oak Kroll) has become a secondary func-tion. The NYSE reminds me of a Las Vegas roulette table these days; that is, people approach it minded investors encourage companies to maximize this year's profits, because they want to see their money turn around fast — faster than any R&D project can possibly crank out a new product. To them, there's no money in research work, or in hiring good staff, or preserving a company's reputation with quality products. They will soon sell their shares, in order to reap their profits, anyway. But what company is going to be stupid enough to stop developing new products and/or otherwise shoot itself in the foot? That's corporation's stockholders own the company, and ultimately, albeit indirectly, make all the deci Both as a scientist and an American, it's frightening to see how over the last two decades, starting with the auto industry, companies cut back on research and product quality, in the interest of reducing costs and maximizing the present year's bottom did cut a lot of real fat off many corporations-but the future of many of America's oldest and biggest companies has also been downsized, in the form of research and development cut-backs. The research labs at IBM, AT&T, GE, and many others are shadows of their former selves. The implications for the economic future of the United States are frightening. CEO's with foresight, who look to making their company profitable for many years to come, become the targets of quick-buck investment groups and find themselves out of work, replaced by a cost-slash-ing big-bottom-line buccaneer. "When will X make a profit for us?!? Three years? Too long, kill ways males) move on to another high-power position before the consequences of such actions hit actionary, but with regard to the stock market that's probably a I'd like to see a return to a majority of responsible and interested shareholders — people who's stock reflects an interest, concern, and trust in the company they own (These days companies find the only way to get such shareholders is to buy up their own stock and sell it to their employees!) Mr. Kutz suggested a path toward that goal in his seminar, one that also addresses the "corporate cavalier" Christopher's words, that "Lim-ited liability encourages undercapitalized and under-insured companies to engage in risky ac- one stone? "As participants in a shared venture, shareholders should be civilly and morally accountable for the unintended consequences of that venture, in proportion to their degree of ownership." You own one fifth of CheapCrude Incorporated? One of their single-hulled tankers split open off the Canadian coast….and they filed for bankruptcy because of the suit against them. But now YOU are on the hook for one fifth of whatever settlement is made against them in court. WHAT? This is where my share-holding friends call me a madman. "How am I supposed to know what CheapCrude is do-ing??? I just noticed they had a big cost-to-earnings ratio and bought some shares!" in the market to make a buck, they should suffer consequences beyond the loss of their initial investment when their efforts contribute to risky, irresponsible ac- Anything else is a rigged craps table, where the risk for market players is shifted to those who suffer the effects of their mad-ness, be it chemical plant workers in Bhopal or fishermen in sible sounds ludicrous only at the would create policies to cover such risk, and people would get into the business of watching corporations to be sure they aren't doing some of the irresponsible things they do today. People will have to trust the corporations they invest in; and they won't trust corporations unde- will begin to think about what their money is taking part in, and a corporation's owners will finally have a real incentive to keep the corporation acting re- anytime soon. So in the mean-time, give some thought to what the money you invest in that mutual fund is doing - besides growing At what cost to the world and its inhabitants are you getting that 15% return? ACADEMY BARBER SHOP 27 N. Catalina Ave., Pasadena Open Tues.-Sat., 7:30 A.M.-4:00 P.M. (818) 449-1681 "Love your neighbor — but don't pull down your hedge." —Ben Franklin GRAND OPENING offer expires 6/30/95 Euro one 950 E Colorado Blvd, Pasadena (818) 577-1828 ESPRESSO SCONES CAPPUCINO MUFFINS FRESH PASTRIES & MORE! BUY 1 CINNAMON TWIST, GET 1 FREE with CALTECH ID The California Tech POLL ferent light. Likewise, only four people mentioned that science allowed them to create things categories, wrote them down, which had not previously ex-isted. People might find a sense of wonder, thrill, and power in longer going into science as a career: 5-9 (see below). There's nothing else I want to do: 8 "Good at science": 5. No choice (locked into science, parents creation, but career choice prob ably isn't based upon these feelings ("problem solving" was only mentioned by one person). Fi-nally, only two people (both un-dergraduates) mentioned con- Gives a fundamental understand- cerns about getting jobs; both ing of the universe: 4 You can believed that they could only get create things: 4. I can get a job jobs in scientific fields and no- in science: ONLY 2. I want to help society: 2. I like problem solving: 1. Science is the funda-teresting responses to this poll; ence, and engineering fields as "science." Second, many people gave short answers, so I'll assume that almost all of the people polled (and not just five) are "good at science." common response I received was that "science is fun." The only professor I got a response from added that "most practicing scientists would give a similar [re-sponse]." Hopefully, this response implies that most people here going into science feel that science is fun. The small percentage (roughly 20%) of this response might be attributable to "You're not going to get a job if you don't have a technical degree." One student was only admitted to technical schools; thus science was chosen for him. "Learning prepares you for any-thing." Three people came to Caltech not knowing about the focus on science. They simply knew it was a good school in math and science, their most likely careers. "Math is pretty." (my favorite response) One person's best high school teachers were math and science teach "It's neat to be able to do something that a majority of the population can't do." "It's real and not stupid." An equal number of people, though, said that money was not an object, and that they would have gone into other fields if money had been done correctly." people told me thing for a career, but science was their first choice. I assumed that everyone here was in a similar situation. Apparently, a small number of people at Caltech have no outside career interests (good news for Caltech if this is a global trend). Five people (1 in 12) specifically admitted that they had no other choice of a career, i.e. they're being forced into a career by parents, college Although this percentage might appear large, people are often torced into circumstance by parents and the "system" (col-lege applications, financial situ-ation, etc.) and find themselves with only one option. Only four people admitted that they were going into science because it promised the best salary of anything they could do. An equal number of people, though, said that money was not an object, and that they would have gone into other fields if money had been their greatest motivation. (Yea. We're not greedy.) How ever, I myself appreciate the salary that a degree will bring me, and I'm pretty sure that a significant number of people are here to improve their financial situa tion from "minimum wage" to at least that of middle class or bet-ter. The philosophical implications of science (understanding of our surroundings) merited only four responses. Indeed many more people (about 10) admitted that they had originally believed that science held " truth" or "understanding" and now see things in an entirely dif- intelligence of scientific prowess." "The quest for knowledge isn't practical." The last response came from somebody who has decided against science as a career. In-deed, out of 59 people, 9 had chosen not to go into science. Out of these 9, one person has chosen economics, and one person has decided to go into archi-tecture. Although some people would argue that both of these fields are part of "science", they fell outside my predetermined definitions of "science." I still have the utmost respect for ar chitecture and economics; neither are trivial by any stretch of the imagination. people have decided that they want to teach science, preferably at the college level. Hopefully a lot of children will benefit from people who might just be able to answer all of their questions (sometimes, it gets really annoying to have teachers unable to explain interesting things). Finally (I'm almost done) (thank God), five people have decided against going into science after learning what it entailed. Some of these people wondered how total understanding could ever be related to a differential equa tion, and others believed that the workload in science would not poll and my analysis. Hopefully, you'll take a look at why you devote your life to science (in one form or another) and you won't think the results of this poll are worthless. Thanks for reading The California Tech June 2, 1995 1 ] An Open House with Avery Center Architects by Adam Villani lounge will even have access to a tower and panoramic balcony. As Last Friday the MOSH usual, the building will physically hosted an open house discussion have a Mediterranean flavor to session with the architects of the it, following the example of most new Avery House building, cur- campus architecture. Avery rently under construction at the House looks to be an exciting southwest corner of Holliston place in which to live, where and Del Mar. Architects Mark undergrads, grads, and faculty Mana Satterhe, em Murdock, and Master of Student Houses Daura Wales examine a model of Avery Hous Denton and Linda Brettler gave can intermingle well. those who stopped by a guided tour of the future complex for undergraduate, graduate, and faculty housing, scheduled to open in the fall of 1996, through the use of intricate laser-cut models and detailed plans. Vice President for Student Affairs Gary Lorden and the MOSH himself, David Wales, were also on hand PASADEnA COMPUTER to answer questions about Avery House's functionality and pur- 1756 E. Colorado Bi, Pasadena CA. 91106 pose. Avery Ilouse will have space Tel: [818)568-1088 Fax:(818)568-9192 for 140 students in 49 singles, 41 doubles, and 3 triples. The singles and doubles will be interspersed nicely throughout the MULTIMEDIA SPECIAL Since 1988 For your convenient FREE deliver to campus building, and the different sections of the building will surround several courtyards of varying size and character. A 3:1 undergrad:graduate ratio is planned, and there will also be five faculty apartments. In addition to the residences in the com-plex, Avery House will contain a limited number of parking spaces and a cafeteria/ small student center. The cafeteria will have a smaller café section which will remain open late into the night, similar to the Coffee-house, and will have a fireplace and big-screen TV. Fireplaces will also be in each lounge, and one Pentium Multimedia - 4X Quad-Speed CD-Rom - Sound Blaster 16-"Creative Lab" - 2 Speakers - Intel NEW Pentium CPU & Fan - 8MB Ram, 1.44MB Floppy - 850MB Fast IDE Hard Disk - PCI Controllel - Type II! - PCI accelerated SVGA w/2MB - 15" 1280.28 N/ "Green" SVGA - 101 Enhanced Keyboard -3 button Mouse - Medium Tower w/230W "UL" P.S 90MHz: $1895 100MHz:$2025 Pentium PCI - LB 486 VESA Multimedia - Double-Speed 2X CD-Rom - Sound Blaster 16, 2 Speakers 14 CD Titles （Encyclopdia...... - 560MB Fast IDE Hard Disk - 486DX2-66NMHz, "GREEN Motherboard - Pentium Overdrive (P24) Ready, wIZIF - 4MB Ram exp. 64MB - VESA Dual IDE FD/HD Controllel - VESA LB accelerated SVGA w/1MB - 14" NI.28 1024 "Power Saving" SVGA - 101 Enhanced Keyboard - 3 Button Mouse - Mini Tower GE additional 3 year on-site warranty avallable! 486DX2-66 $1095 486DX4-100$1180 486DX2-66 VESA ACCESSORIES CLASSIFIED ADS FOR SALE-USED DRAFTING TABLE Metal 60"x 38" drafting table, 36" base, adjustable-angle top with cutting pad, two drawers (one large, one smail). $195 obo. Call the Tech at x6154. HOUSING - ROOM FOR RENT in 5-bedroom house in Alhambra. No pets. Furnished or unfurnished. Contact Diana at (818) 284-7159 ог (818) 356-3400. SERVICES-FLOWERLADY SUBSCRIPTIONS $15 monthly fee. Fresh flowers delivered each week (4 deliveries per month). Vases are recycled. It's like bringing sunshine, smiles, and kind thoughts to work. Just call (818) 359-3857. TRAVEL- DO EUROPE $269 ANYTIME! It voure a lulle nexible, we can nelp you beat the airline's prices. No hidden charges. AIRHITCH® Airhitch@netcom.com (310) 394-0550 RATES. $4.00 for first 30 words; ...10¢ for each additional word. Send written ad with payment to 40-58. Deadline is 6 p.m., Monday before issue. No charge for or-campus lost & found. -Pentium 90/100 "GREEN" Motherboard - "GREEN" Mother Board - Intel NEW Pentium 90 or 100 CPU W/Fan - Pentium (P24) Ready, w/ZIF Socket - 256K Cache exp. to 512K - 4MB Ram exp. 64MB - 8MB Ram exp. 128MB - 560MB Fast IDE Hard Disk - 850MB Fast IDE Hard Disk - VESA LB IDE Controller - PCI LB IDE Controller - "Type 3" - VESA LB accelerated SVGA w/1MB - PCILB accelerated SVGA w/2MB-ene -14 1044N.40 Energy save ovA - 15" NI .28 Flat Screen SVGA - 101 Enhanced Keyboard • 3 Button Mouse Good - 101 Enhanced Keyboard - 3 Button Mouse - Medium Tower w/230W PS Price - Mini Tower w/230W "UL" P.S P5 - 90MHz: $1625 486DX2-66MHz: $899 P5-100MHz: $1750 486DX4-100MHz:$985 1 Year Parts & Labor Warranty HP Printers Hard Disk 830M2 15- 4244 1.2GB IDE $355 EPSON Printers S53 clontaser 1101 300 do. 543 ActionLaser 1400 600 cpl $669 LQ-570 $255 Mother Board Pentlum 90MHz 256k, w/2 16550C Serlal, 1 Enhanced Parallel, PCI Controllel-Type III W/o CPU... Monitor MGC 14" 1024.28 NI "GREEN"SVGA MGC 15* 1280 ..$225 GREEN" SVGA NEC 15- 15.28 NISCA 'GREEN" SVGA Fax/Modem ...$59 Authorized Rescller HP LaserJet 4V & 4MV * Fast graphics printing * 16-ppm speed in a desktop printer * True 600 dpi print quality *Wide-format printing on 11" x 17" paper * 4MB (4V) 12MB (4MV) * Support 12 network operating systems wi aomade bo owlichine HP InkJet 320 HP DeskJet 540 HP InkJet 660C Color $465 HP LaserJet 4L HP LaserJet 4P HP LaserJet 4+ HP LaserJet 4M+ HP LaserJet 4Si HP LaserJet 4SiMX HP ScanJet 3P HP ScanJet IIICX $295 $279 $499 $895 $1375 $1895 $2785 $3995 $475 $895 28,800 (Internal) w/Software ouce b¥oan aa2a. momie Compatible 3 button mouse Microsoft bus mouse Compatible trackbal Multimedia 2x CD-Rom & Sound Blaster 16 Teac 4x Multisession Photo CD-Rom. 4x SCSI CD-Rom (wo Controliel) Souad clatarta Sound Binate: 186/0 Sound Blaster AWE 32 $125 Tape Backup Conner B5OMB (Internal wlap .$19: $351 Colorado 700MB (internal) Colorado 1.3GB (Internal) 4V $1895, 4MV $2795 School PO,s are welcome! Fax us your PO and well prepare your order upon approval by our financial depart ment. It's that easy ! Leasing program available - 90 days same as cash! Ask our sales person for details. All prices reflect a 3% discount for purchases made with cash. There are no discount for sales made with credit cards. Price change without any notice. 12 lune 2, 1995 Seniors! From the Big T: Please turn in your mailing address by June 2nd to which we can send your yearbooks to you in the fall. Please remember that if you do not have your address turned in by then, a $5 mailing fee will be charged when you later request your yearbooks to be mailed. Also, if you wish to have your senior pictures back, please send us a self-ad-dressed sealed envelope. Any questions can be directed to big-t@cco or x1223. Send everything to SAC 27-58. Announcements > **Auditions For The Fall Of Theater: TACIT will be producing two small plays this fall. "Revenge of the Space Pandas," a comedy by David Mamet, promises to be enormously fun: it will hopefully be produced around Halloween (with a possible midnight performance). "Under Milk Wood," a play by Dylan Thomas, is basically a long poem for many parts. We will stage readings both on campus and at the E-bar in November. Remember that as these are "small plays" they will require relatively small commit-ments; thus, if you've been scared away by the size of past produc-tions, this is your chance! Auditions for both will be held in Winnett Clubroom I on Saturday, June 3rd, between 4 and 6 p.m., Thursday, June 8th, between 6 and 9 p.m., and Saturday, June 10th, between 2 and 4 p.m. Please contact Maneesh Sahani at x8337 ONLY $99 To Students, Faculty & Staff......$325 to Others INTRODUCING "ShiningStar Dental Plan"sM • Full Exam and Consultation Six Basic Screening X-Rays Full Mouth Cleaning/Polishing • Fluoride Treatment Two Silver Fillings* BONUS BENEFIT: 40% Off Any Additional Fillings & Crowns Bring Ad with School ID @ Offer Expires 6/30/95 Call for Appointment 818-356-0338 reen Street, Suite L-2, Pasadena Validated Parking In Rear. Shining Star -Dental Private Care At Clinic Price. Announcements denotes a new announcement. or at 793-2879 for more informa-tion. * The Caltech Y currently has balcony tickets to Walt Disney's Beauty and the Beast for $35 a piece for the performance at 1:00 p.m. on July 23rd at the Schubert Theater. Tickets may be purchased from the Y on the second floor of Winnett; only two tickets per person, please. discovery, coping with families... We begin with a focus topic but move to whatever is feeling most relevant to the group that night. Refreshments are served. For in-formation, please call 395-8331. Coming Events Caltech has publicly announced its right to create lots and lots of "noise, dust, vibration and utility interruptions as a result of construction of the Avery House at 293 S. Holliston Avenue, from now through August, 1996 from 6:30 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. daily." For further information or specific details, please call extension 4724. The Theater Arts of Caltech present their performance of As-sassins, based on the book by John Weidman, on June 2nd and 3rd at 8 p.m. and June 4th at 2 p.m. in the Dabney Lounge on the Caltech Campus. Tickets are available ahead of time through the Caltech Ticket Office (x4652, tickets@caltech.edu); admission will be $6 for students with ID, $10 for general admission. Group rates are available. Club Announcements The Caltech Muslim Student Association will hold Muslim Friday Prayers weekly in the Y-lounge at 12:15 p.m. The Caltech Ballroom Dance Club Friday beginning and intermediate SALSA classes will be held this Friday, June 2nd, in "Take a Break and Spend Some Time with Friends." The office of the International Student Programs would like to invite you to our Open House for coffee, tea and conversation. Every Wednesday from 4:00 p.m. - 5:30 p.m. at the office of International Student Programs, Olive Walk. Open to the entire Caltech community. Winnett Lounge. Intermediate class is from 7 to 8:20 p.m., and beginning class is from 8:30 to 9:45 p.m. Taught by professional instructor Enio Cordoba, no experience needed for beginning class though six months prior dance experience is recommended for the intermediate class. No partner is required. There will be 2 more classes - From the Counseling June 9. Registration is $12 for Center Caltech students, employees, or JPLers, and $24 otherwise The Gay, Lesbian and Bisexual (couples will be charged $24 if Support Group meets the first one of the two is from Caltech or and third Tuesdays of each month JPL). Come to the first class, even at 7:30 p.m. in the Health Center if you haven't yet registered! For Lounge. This confidential meet- more information, contact Bob ing is open to all Caltech commu- Herman at rherman@arms.gps. nity members looking for a sup-caltech.edu, or at 393-4720. portive context in which to address questions and concerns The Caltech Ballroom Dance about sexual orientation - includ- Club offers free beginning classes ing coming out, being out, self- to all. Classes are Wednesdays at OLDEI PARIAN TRAVEL LOB Caltech Officially Approved Most professional, courteous, economical and efficient service for your official and personal travel needs. Free service to you. We deliver. Airlines, Cruises, Tours, Hotels, Car Rentals. Individual, Commercial, Groups. (818) 577-8200 468 S. Sierra Madre Blvd., Pasadena Save up to 35% BURGER Save up to 35% CONTINENTAL TO ALL CALTECH STUDENTS, FACULTY AND STAFF: All the time. Seven days a week. HEAR THE WEDNESDAY NIGHT JAZZ BAND Mondays - Half price margaritas Tuesdays - Beer half price. Wednesdays, Thursdays 3-7 P.M. BREAKFAST BUFFET Mon-Sat $3.95 LUNCH with soft drink $4.95 DINNER with soft drink $6.25 Breast of chicken, seafood, lamb, or the day's special SPECIALTIES Shish kebab Shaorma Souvlaki steak Fresh fish and lamb Baklava Homemade pizza Gourmet hamburgers We cater for all occasions 535 S. Lake Ave. (818) 792-6634 7:00 p.m. in Winnett Lounge. People are welcome to join the classes any time; no experience is required. Come with or without a partner. This week the club will hopefully be learning the cha-cha, and will do other dances in the future. For more information, collidel Bob Herman di rherman@arms.gps. callech.edu orat 393-4720. Internships ano Competitions *P* Be a part of the search for Pasadena's New Year's Day am-bassadors!: The Rose Queen and Royal Court of the 107th Tournament of Roses Auditions will be held on Saturday, September 16th between 9:00 a.m. and noon, then 1:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m., or Mon-day, September 18th, between 3:00 and 5:00 p.m. Each participant will receive a ticket for two to the Royal Ball, a semi-formal dance presented by Nordstrom and hosted by the Pasadena Tournament of Roses. This year the Royal Ball will be held on Friday, September 22nd, at the Pasadena Hilton Hotel. The Tournament of Roses Royal Court selection process is open to all unmarried women. Participants must be legal residences of the Trustee Areas of the Pasadena Area Community College District. Each partici pant must be enrolled either as a senior in high school or a full-time college student. Participants must demonstrate that they have earned at least a 2.0 grade point average in current course work and last year's course work. Participants must be at least 17 years of age by December 31st, 1995, and not more than 21 years before January 2nd, 1996 Each participant must complete an official application and participate in one of the interview sessions. For additional information call the Tournament of Roses at 449-4100 The Mathematics Department is pleased to announce two catego ries of prizes offered to Caltech undergraduates: the E.T. Bell Undergraduate Mathematics Research prize of $500 to a junior or senior for the best original mathematics paper, and The Morgan Ward Competition for freshmen and/or sophomores. $75 will be awarded for the two to four best entries of a mathematical problem with a solution or significant contribution toward a solu-tion. Complete details will be mailed and are also available in the mathematics department at The California TECH Caltech 40-58 SAC Pasadena, California, 91125 The California Tech 253 Sloan. Fellowships and Scholarships The Financial Aid Office has applications and / or information on the following and additional scholarships. All qualified students are encouraged to apply. The Financial Aid Office is located at 515 S. Wilson, second floor. Jewish Family and Children's Services announces the continued availability of financial support for Jewish individuals and their fami-lies. There are loans, grants and scholarships available, and students may qualify for up to $5,000 in aid. The Financial Aid Office has a flyer and questionnaire that you can use to apply, or you can call (415) 561-1226. There are no deadlines and students may apply throughout the year. The John Gyles Education Fund is again this year offering financial assistance to students in the United States Canadian or American citizenship is a require-ment. Awards are available for all areas of post-secondary study. A minimum GPA of 2.7 is required. Criteria other than strictly academic ability and financial need are considered in the selection process. Selected students will receive up to $2,500. Deadlines for 1995 are June 15th, and November 30th. Applications must be mailed by those dates. Students may receive applications by sending their request, along with a self-addressed, stamped (US 32 cent) No. 10 envelope to: The John Gyles Education Fund, Attention: R. James Cougle, Administrator, P.O. Box 4808, 712 Riverside Dr., Fredericton, New Brunswick, Canada E3B 5G4. >** The California Tech has released details on its Ist annual Journalism Scholarship: the top five competitors to turn in a front-page type article based on either the question "What truly annoys you about Wei-Hwa?" or an article based on top choices for the award of "Flake-Boy of the Year" will be given each a scholarship of $1.00000 (ves, one whole dol lar!) towards their education. No satires, please. PREPARE THYSELF! THE TOTEM COMETH SOON!